Relationship OCD

Relationship OCD, or ROCD, is a form of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder where a person experiences constant doubts, fears, and anxiety about their romantic relationship. Even when things are going well, someone with ROCD might feel stuck in a spiral of “What ifs?”—questioning whether they really love their partner, whether they’re with the “right” person, or whether they’re somehow making a huge mistake.

These intrusive thoughts can feel incredibly real and distressing, often leading to compulsive behaviors meant to gain clarity or reassurance—but the relief doesn’t last for long.

These are the kinds of thoughts that tend to show up and cause anxiety:

• “Am I truly in love with my partner?”
• “What if I’m settling or picked the wrong person?”
• “What if we’re not compatible long-term?”
• “What if I’m more attracted to someone else?”
• “What if something I did ruined our relationship?”
• “What if I’m missing red flags and I just don’t see it?”

Even when the relationship is healthy and strong, these thoughts can create constant doubt and emotional discomfort.

These are the things people with ROCD might do to try to feel more certain or “figure it all out”:

• Asking for reassurance—from a partner or loved ones: “Do you think we’re okay?” “Do I really love them?”
• Mentally reviewing conversations, moments, or feelings to check for signs of doubt or clarity
• Comparing their relationship to others’ (friends, movies, past relationships)
• Avoiding situations that could bring up relationship-related anxiety (like certain conversations or romantic events)
• Overanalyzing their partner’s behavior, feelings, or the relationship itself, looking for proof that things are “right” or “wrong”